Saturday, January 19, 2008

FLIGHT OF FANCY/FANTASY

I don't know if its just me but i have this fascination with gals with dashboard flat stomachs. For some reason i cant seem to take my eyes of their stomachs but this is more from envy than desire. "I want that tummy" is all i think about and wonder if they appreciate this part of their anatomy.


I have been caught out a few times staring and i have to say its quite embarrassing. Maybe they think im ogling them with desire and i want to start explaining myself but if i did I'd probably end up sounding like some weirdo off her meds.


So which would be better? To look like some sex starved lesbian or a weirdo off her meds? Personally i don't think either will do. So i've been spending more time than is healthy trying to come up with the perfect explanation for the next time i'm caught out.


Maybe i could just say "I like your stomach." I'm sure if i said that they'd probably take one step back from me and think " I'm having a bad day. I sure don't this nutter making it any worse." Oh i don't know anymore. Maybe i should seek professional help/advice. I'm sure if i tried i'd be laughed out of a straight jacket.


Now, when i see a woman with beautiful hair i have no shame in walking up to her and saying "Oi, i like your hair, where did you get it done? Can i have her number/address and how much does she charge?" Then we'll get into a long drawn out conversation about it.


On the other hand if i see someone with bad hair, I have no problem with bitching about it with my friends. If i'm alone i'll just smirk and shake my head in wonderment. Of course this is done discreetly lest she knows then i'd probably go home with no hair on my head.


I'm sure some random person has done the same to me when i'm having a bad hair day/month, but that is where my beloved hat comes in. I've got all manner of hats in my wardrobe for said days, and they are plenty (bad hair days).


Actually in the last few months my hair has grown a brain cell. I've tried everything to tame it but that only lasts a few days then it starts resembling Don King's hair. Yep that's right. Its not funny anymore. I'm actually tempted to visit my local barber and have it all shaved off, but its winter so it might not be my brightest idea yet.


Then again i'm thinking maybe get some crazy haircut and put some colour, something to reflect my personality. My new year resolution is to be true to myself. For the last couple of years i've tried the girly girl look and im sick and tired of it (high maintenance). Influence from long ago ex. I'm not saying i was trying to not be myself but rather trying to be what i thought society expected me of me i.e conforming. NO MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!


So maybe in the next couple of weeks i'll be sporting my new look. Wish me luck and more than anything wish me courage to back up my thoughts.

13 comments:

Jayn Sean said...

Oya! I feel you on flat stomachs. I wish i had that kind too ooo! Well, mine is not really that protruding, but i cant take it out, like wear something 'stomach out', you know? But i really wish i had that one too. Bwahahahahaha..but i dont stare like you do..lol..i can just picture how you look at them..lol..funny.
I cant remember when last i had a bad hair day..no! i dont remember.

Hey...ermmmmm..thanx for stopping by my page. I really appreciate it.

Anonymous said...

Oh i like the labels
tummy, rant, hair..
LOL!!!

Eat a lot more apples, greens and eat meat only on the weekends...

you'll soon be the one having "us" looking at your flat er... tummy

You've been caught staring
LOL!!

the antipop said...

i on the other hand hate them, wish the bad luck and damn them all to hell for having flat tummies they can display. not only do i not have a flat tummy,it is hairy too. looks like some badly plucked chicken! and as for the hair...

Anonymous said...

Flat stomachs piss me off reason ... Mine failed to take that road.
Bad hair month are you for real?

Tandra said...

flat stomchs..enough said..

Bad hair months.. i can sooo relate.

Thinking of also doing something with the hair..do something thats "Me"..i cld learn something from u..yeh, definately can..

Anonymous said...

maybe you can go up to them and say, i've been trying to get my stomach to look that good for years but nothing seems to work, could you give me any advice?

Anonymous said...

Think anorexia and you'll feel better about your belly.

candybox said...

@ jay ati no bad hair days? Lucky you.

@ mrb2b i do try to eat a balanced diet but im too lazy/busy for sit ups. Im a size 14/16 and had gone down to size 12 but still didn't like my tummy

@ Antipop not just a plucked chicken but badly as well. lol. I feel for you

@ be silent yes a month and counting.

@ tandra atleast know i know im not alone

@sybella yeah that could do will try it next time.

@bomseh anorexia is a different animal altogether.

Unknown said...

I'm completely with you on the flat stomach thing. Why? It's simple. I used to have one and now my midsection is SO FAR beyond that point. *sigh*

Anonymous said...

I def feel you there...at first I thought this post was written by my best pal coz it sounds so much like what we say..lol

my stomach will get like that...gym here I come:)

Anonymous said...

hit the gym sista...

Afrobabe said...

I feel you on the stomach thing....but its much easier just staring at them than actually doing sit ups...lol

candybox said...

@ beth lol

@val you must be my other best friend

@ neema i bet you dont have weight issues

@ afrobabe hear hear sister