on my deathbed

I think im nearing my final days. Everything hurts - literally. The only bit that isn't in pain is my hair. Which is a pity seeing as that is the only part of me that i wouldn't mind hacking off with a pair of blunt scissors.

I suspect the flu but haven't bothered to see my GP. He is what i would politely refer to as an asshole. Arrogant, little shit!!! I think i feel better already after venting. Been self medicating for the last 2 days, but the relief is temporary. Will probably go to A&E and wait it out. With any luck i'll pass out at the reception so i wont have to wait all day to see a doctor. If you live in UK you know what im talking about.

Let me entertain you with a list of my symptoms:
- swollen tonsils
-headache
-sore neck
-backache
-stomachache
-arm and thigh muscles ache
-wrist, elbow, knee joints ache
-loss of appetite (3 days and counting, but may be my weight loss programme)
-cold sweats

Enough said. As you can tell im having a ball. Maybe i'll come back and write my eulogy, you know, get my affairs in order. I've always wanted to say that.